🎆 Supporting Children and Teens with Selective Mutism on the Fourth of July & Other Large Gatherings 🎆

By Dr. Elisa Shipon Blum

The Fourth of July is often filled with fun, family, and fireworks. But for many children and teens with Selective Mutism (SM) or social communication anxiety, it can be a challenging day.

🔴 Why? Because it’s often a “3 L Environment,” as Dr. Elisa Shipon-Blum (Dr. E) describes:

Loud – fireworks, music, cheering, and crowds create sensory overload
Large – big gatherings increase anxiety and discomfort
Lotsa People – unfamiliar faces and social demands can feel overwhelming

For children and teens with SM, these environments can heighten anxiety and make them shut down or withdraw. Remember, SM is not a choice, it’s an anxiety disorder that makes speaking feel impossible in certain settings.

💡 Tips to Support Your Child or Teen Today

✅ Prepare Ahead.

Review what will happen, where you’re going, who will be there, and when. Use visuals or social stories to build predictability. Implement games and goals such as Selective Mutism Sandwich Q’s for children and Selective Mutism Action Plans for older children/goals. Watch fireworks videos together so they know what to expect.

✅ Choose Your Location Wisely.

Consider staying on the outskirts of gatherings or watching fireworks from a distance or inside your car. This reduces noise and crowds while still enjoying the experience.

✅ Bring Comfort Items.

Noise-canceling headphones 🎧, fidgets, favorite snacks 🍿, or a cozy blanket can help your child regulate and feel safe.

✅ Have an Exit Plan.

Let your child know you can leave if it gets too overwhelming. Having an exit strategy reduces anticipatory anxiety.

✅ Respect Their Communication Stage.

Don’t pressure them to greet everyone or engage beyond their comfort level, but facilitate ‘games’ or goals to help with progression of communication. Use strategies like Handover/Takeover™ to facilitate social engagement and involve them nonverbally (e.g., handing out plates or sparklers), Big Five Words, Copy Back, etc. Based on the 3 L’s, you can Bridge up or you may need to Bridge down to accommodate their anxiety.

✅ Meet Them Where They Are.

Not every child enjoys fireworks or large parties, especially our sensory sensitive children. At home, with less people such as backyard sparklers, watching fireworks on TV, or making Fourth of July crafts can be meaningful alternatives.

❤️ Remember: Comfort + Connection Builds Confidence….The fuel to communication progression.

By avoiding or adapting 3 L Environments when needed and prioritizing your child’s comfort and connection, you help build the confidence they need for future experiences. Their courage today might be watching fireworks from afar, holding your hand tightly, or simply staying regulated through a noisy evening.