By Dr. Elisa Shipon Blum 

As the school year comes to a close, a new season begins. Summer brings activities, camps, family vacations, and social gatherings. For most children, this is exciting. But for children and teens with Selective Mutism, this can feel overwhelming. Why?

Because with every new setting comes something very specific and often very challenging.

Questions.

🧠 The Hidden Challenge: It’s Not Just Talking, It’s Processing

Children with Selective Mutism often can speak, but in many situations, they do not. This is not defiance or stubbornness. It is anxiety.

More specifically, it is the pressure to process and respond in the moment. When a question is asked, the brain must process language, formulate a response, manage anxiety, and execute communication all at once. That is a lot.

When the load becomes too high, children may freeze, avoid, or shut down.

🎯 The Solution: Preparation

Within the Social Communication Anxiety Treatment® (S-CAT®) model, preparation is a powerful tool. Preparing for questions helps minimize the need to think and process. When children know what might be asked and what they can say in return, they are far more likely to engage, respond, initiate, and feel confident.

✏️ The Most Common End-of-Year Questions

These are the questions children will hear again and again:

“What are you doing over the summer?”
“How was school?”
“What camps are you going to?”
“What did you do in school?”
“What grade are you going into?”

These questions are predictable, repetitive, and perfect for practice.

✈️ Family Vacations Bring More Questions

Summer often includes family travel, which introduces even more social interaction. Children may interact with relatives they have not seen in a while, hotel staff, servers, activity leaders, and other children. With that comes more questions.

From family:
“What have you been up to?”
“How was school?”
“What are you doing this summer?”

From new people:
“Where are you visiting from?”
“Are you having fun?”
“What would you like to eat?”

From peers:
“Do you want to play?”
“Can I join you?”
“What are you doing?”

Without preparation, these moments can feel unpredictable and overwhelming. With preparation, they become opportunities.

🧩 Turning Questions into a Plan Using S-CAT®

Step 1: Prepare Answers

Start simple.

“I’m going to camp.”
“School was good.”
“I’m going into 5th grade.”
“We’re visiting from Pennsylvania.”

The goal is readiness, not perfection.

Step 2: Use Choices

If the child does not readily respond, even nonverbally, Patents to ask ‘Choice’ questions to reduce pressure and help with processing.

“Was school fun or hard?”
“Are you going to day camp or sleepaway camp?”

The right answer is second, which helps guide the child toward responding.

Step 3: Use Visuals

Visual supports are essential:

  • Write answers in a notebook.
  • Use cue cards.
  • Keep notes on a phone.
  • Create simple charts.

Seeing the response reduces the need to generate it on the spot.

Step 4: Use “I Just” and “I Am” Statements

These statements support initiation, elaboration, and natural conversation flow. “I just” statements help describe recent experiences.

“I just got here today.”
“I just went swimming.”
“I just had lunch.”

“I am” statements help describe current experiences or personal information.

“I am going to camp.”
“I am in 6th grade.”
“I am visiting from Pennsylvania.”
“I am excited to go to the beach.”

These statements reduce processing demands, provide a starting point, and help expand communication.

Step 5: Practice the Give and Take

Communication is not just answering questions. It is interacting. Key S-CAT® strategies support this process.

Copy Back is a strategy that involves repeating or mirroring part of what was said to keep the conversation going. Sandwich Questions™ involve answering a question and then asking one in return to create a natural back-and-forth exchange. The Common Questions Process focuses on preparing for predictable interactions ahead of time.

Example:

Adult: “What are you doing this summer?”
Child: “I am going to camp. What are you doing?”

Or

Child: “I just signed up for canoe camp. What are you doing this summer?”

🌉 Meet the Child Where They Are: The Social Communication Bridge®

Children communicate at different stages, and strategies should match their level.

Stage 1 involves nonverbal communication such as pointing, showing, or using visuals. Stage 2 involves transitional verbal communication such as whispering to a buddy or using a Verbal Intermediary®. Stage 3 involves verbal communication, starting with short responses and building toward expanded communication.

It is always appropriate to adjust up or down based on the child’s comfort and the setting.

🎯 Parent Tip: Don’t Wait, Facilitate

One of the Golden Rules of S-CAT® is to facilitate communication rather than wait for it to happen. Before an event, outing, or trip, try practicing likely questions.

“Let’s practice the questions people might ask you.”

Keep it fun, structured, and predictable. Even a few minutes of preparation can make a meaningful difference.

🚀 The Big Takeaway

When children and teens are prepared, they are less likely to freeze or overthink and more likely to feel in control. They begin to move from being passive in communication to actively participating.

💡 Final Thought

Communication is not just about speaking. It is about feeling ready, supported, and capable.

By preparing for common questions across school transitions, summer activities, and family vacations, we provide children and teens with a plan, a path, and a voice.